Stop Parental Alienation

Stop Parental Alienation

“Parental Alienation” typically occurs in high conflict separation / divorce cases when one parent (normally the custodial parent) behaves to the child in a manner that targets the other parent through unjustified negativity and manipulation with the aim to damage and eventually destroy the child’s relationship with the targeted parent. Parental alienation is characterised by the child’s behaviour being excessively hostile and rejecting the targeted parent without sound rationale and reason.

Children need both parents. Children who are alienated from one parent often develop long lasting consequences in terms of mental health issues and psychological problems that may lead to serious educational and development issues, aggressive and impulsive behaviour, guilt, anxiety, depression, loss of self esteem, self confidence and self image, substance abuse (drugs, alchohol) and in extreme cases suicide.

Parental alienation can be evaluated through the child exhibiting a number of the following indicators or signs concerning the targeted parent:

  • The child expresses a relentless hatred for the targeted parent. 
  • The child’s language parrots the language of the alienating parent. 
  • The child vehemently rejects visiting the targeted parent. 
  • Many of the child’s beliefs are enmeshed with the alienating parent. 5. Many of the child’s beliefs are delusional and frequently irrational. 
  • The child’s reasons are not from direct experiences but from what has been told to him or her by others. 
  • The child has no ambivalence in his or her feelings; they are all hatred with no ability to see the good. 
  • The child has no capacity to feel guilty about his or her behavior toward the targeted parent. The child and the alienating parent are in lockstep to denigrate the targeted parent. 
  • The child can appear like a normal healthy child. But when asked about the targeted parent, it triggers his or her hatred.

A child needs both parents for their development and emotional and physical wellbeing. Much has been written about Parental Alienation and it is considered by many mental health professionals and scholars as the worst form of emotional child abuse.

We need to take every action to recognize early warning signals and prevent parental alienation from occurring. Institutions and laws need to be reformed to recognize parental alienation as a form of child abuse, impose the necessary and strong court outcomes to deter it and ensure the right actions are taken to repair and restore parent-child relationship when parental alienation has already occurred. TIme is of the essence when parental alienation is involved hence it is very important that the institutional and legal framework places adequate emphasis on early intervention and prevention. However, when parental alienation has unfortunately already occurred to a great degree or extent, situations have to be evaluated carefully as to the best way forward to safeguard the future of the child.